What the Hell Happened to Fatty Koo?

What you hear is a testa

to get you to move your chesta

bounce your body like a seizure

make you loose all your respa

--Bounce

You know what’s effed up? At 9:23pm on April 21st 2005, Columbians sat around their TV’s screens with a Corona in one hand and a mixed drink in the other (or maybe that was just me) anxiously waiting to see a glimpse of their city or people they know on BET. (The artwork me & Ray reproduced was on the opening scene! Uh—huhm…sorry.) And no, that’s not the effed up part. The part that I felt bad about was that our very own urban reporter, Donna Marbury was on TV that same night, and we didn’t even watch (or maybe that was just me), and she was on for some important shit!
So anyway, what the phuck happened to Fatty Koo? Well I’m glad you asked. Through the magic of technology I can now do a search on them bastards and find out….
Hm. Let’s see…. They supposedly had a free concert in Boston earlier this month…. (Laa—Da dee, laa daa ddaah)….. Looks like “Chills” will be their next single released… (Mama’s little baby loves)…. Phuck it. That’s all I got. Well, be on the look out for the next groups to “Blow up” outta Columbus. We got Banned Wagon Music (Buh, buh, buh, buh), Elevator Music (3emink Bitch!), and 3rd Eye (um—er..ah…Fo chizzle….?). Dee (from Banned Wagon) is working on her solo joint, Rashad (PITTSBURGH!!from elevator music) is always on the grind, and ya’ll already know about Middle Child, who is constantly tearin’ up the night scene at many of Columbus’ events (sorry for bein’ rude to you that one night, I’m a hater. You know I think you the $#!+, though!). When ya’ll mah-ah-phuckas get on, you better keep Columbus updated. Ya’ll know this is where ya’ll started!
Don’t forget, I got my other blizzog up and rizzn. “Spotlight on….,” where I will interview a totally different person every single week! Hey. Hey, hey. Everybody’s got a story to tell. Even you!